• Richard Scrimger

virtual entry

All right, it's official. Into The Ravine is gone from me. I will not see those pages again until they are bound and shipped. Funny how many mistakes you can catch even after having gone over the book a bunch of times. Simple arithmetic, for example. If Jules travels two inches an hour (no, he is not a glacier; there's a map in the book) and it's five inches to his destination, it will not take him five hours to get there. It took him five hours several drafts ago when it was a bigger map. Whew. Meanwhile, I have a new friend on myspace. Her name is Bethany. She is from California, and her headline -- this is the phrase that sums up your personality; mine, for instance, is, Well, hello, though there are some elaborate ones out there (A million death stars shine their hatred from my soul to yours or Love is the sum of all fears and did not exist until I met you -- two people I think I'd need time to get to know properly, though come to think of it they'd probably get along great if they ever met), anyway, Bethany's headline -- is: I can't think of a headline. Hmmm. On the other hand, Bethany is 24 and a gymnast. Well, hello. But I'm growing discouraged with myspace. I can't hang onto my friends there. Tom may or may not have disappeared. Helena is hounding me for personal information (credit card numbers; and we hardly know each other!) and Salerio hasn't written in weeks. Meanwhile, I read that JT has -- get this -- over two million friends on myspace. Two million! Apparently it is a new status symbol to have a lot of myspace friends, and celebs are constantly collecting and comparing (I think Adam Brody has only 1.2 million friends -- though I may have him confused with some other neglected fellow.) Two million friends -- can you imagine the birthday party? (Mom, can me and my friends have a sleepover? Now, Justin ... ) He'd have to rent a large city. Mind you, he'd sure get a lot of joke gifts. So easy to editorialize here that we can consider it done. There. I just made a virtual comment on virtual friendship. Pithy, wasn't it? (Too bad all that pith sticks between your teeth. I'll try to make sure my next comment is peeled.) Besides, my daughter assures me that myspace is out. No one is using it anymore, she says (except I guess JT and his Montreal-sized posse). She and her crowd are all on facebook. Apparently it's like myspace, only different. Yep. (Now that went down a lot smoother, don't you think?)

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Richard Scrimger | scrimgerr@gmail.com | Toronto, ON, Canada